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I've counted all of these streets, I've seen all of us on the curbs
Through it's sickly pull to everything, to everything we never wanted.
all of the songs, all of the drinks, and all of the shows
my brain was lost somewhere in my wait for this bleak future
And I don't know if you see it, too. It's the feeling of our demise
when the sky looks darker every morning I try to rest my tired eyes.
so leave me in the states.
It's okay, I'll miss you when you're away
so leave me in the states.
It's okay, I'd fuck it up anyway.
I caught your laughter, you were drunk and singing loud
along with some band from Colorado that we had met the day prior.
We were hopeful, we were done, we were ready for something
but the way the world works, it takes all your hope away.
And I don't know if I'm growing up, it hardly seems like it
Everything seems to move so fast most of the time
so leave me in the states.
It's okay, I'll miss you when you're away
so leave me in the states.
It's okay, I'd fuck it up anyway.
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Can you tell me where you've been? Can you keep my out of trouble like you said you would before? Everything has changed since I saw you last December, I can't even remember your face anymore.
I've lost control
I've lost all control
I've lost control
I don't know what I'll say when I get home.
Can't tell you where I've been, but I've been getting into trouble like I've never been before. Nothing has change, I guess I'll drink to that. I just don't have time for you anymore.
I've lost control
I've lost all control
I've lost control
I don't know what I'll say when I get home.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'LL SAY WHEN I GET HOME.
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3. |
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You talked and you talked about the things that you missed. Threw your body around, pissed in a fit. And I knew, oh I knew that this wasn't over, put your head in your heart, some over-exposure. I guess that you guessed that it was only in time that our minds would give out and I'd get mine. But I'm fine, man, I'm fine. I'm glad you moved on, but these streets are getting colder, and I've made you into a song.
Do you remember, I remember, sitting crossed-legged in December, outside of Center trying to break my fever. There was this band, a good band. playing songs we all seemed to like, you were there and you looked so pretty, I was too nervous that night. And Later on, later on, when you had finally gone, I banged my head against a wall and focused on how long. I've been stupid and unconscious through most of my life, and it has ruined every chance of trying to kiss you tonight.
Trying to kiss you tonight.
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4. |
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Reworking my head, I force myself out of bed. Its been days since I ate, it's been months since I've felt okay. I've been cursed by my instincts, I can't even tell if you're feeling bored. it's something I'm working on, it's something I don't want anymore. Hey, wait, you're already leaving? I wish that I wasn't so awkward. I would ask you to stay, but I'm embarrased. What am I talking about? I can't even afford this. But I still like you.
Well, time tends to pass slowly when you're locked in some summer retreat. All the boys and girl together, tight in their fuzzy memories. And you can't remember the last time you even let go, back then if you couldn't swim with a shirt on you'd go straight home. Because, fuck, you hated everyone in this city. Breath held underwater, hiding your body self-consciously. coke bottles and cigarettes infest these apartment poolsides. right when you get back up for breath everyone is always gone. And you always think it's your fault.
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5. |
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You were wasted at the corner at some 7-11 parking lot, when the morning woke you up. It was a dream, but it had felt so real. You had nothing anymore and you were damn scared. And to think of all the friends that backed you up, you only pushed them all away. You just wanted to be left alone, You just wanted to feel the pressure dissipate. I can hear them in basements, in small rooms, in the venues, trying to get through to me, urging me to say something. and if it's not in these songs, then I don't know where I went wrong, I just need something to believe in.
I can recall the way it felt when you said I was impossible, but the boys and girls of Winter are still huddled close together, still singing on and on and on and on. I can hear them in basements, in small rooms, in the venues, trying to get through to me, urging me to say something. and if it's not in these songs, then I don't know where I went wrong, I just need something to believe in.
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6. |
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And we drive all night to the same radio static
And we are growing up to the same noise every year
when death controls every part of our existence
it's hard to find another soul to turn to.
"This isn't what I thought would happen"
you told me on the balcony after I had kissed you.
"It hurts to be the one who is always misunderstood
and it's always weird when someone wants to get to know me
so often I retreat back into my shell of an existence
It's best if you let me lay here,
it's best if you just keep me at home."
"This isn't what I asked for" you had said
You were always sucker for things I wished to avoid
Living in your car, in the middle of a Texas winter
It's not too cold, but the weather is still getting you down.
the weather is still getting you down
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7. |
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The sun rises like a flame, a becon to guide me through these highways.
I check the messages on my phone, they speak their lament but they are alone.
I haven't had very much to say or at least at it seems that way these days
and I stare down this corridor where she isn't waiting for me anymore
But I am alright, well, atleast, I feel alive.
Whatever it is, ya know, I feel fine.
Under this blue where I somehow just wish for you
I take my caffiene pills to stay high
and I rub my eyes, I'm alright to drive.
We're speeding down the interstate, shaving minutes so we won't be late
I am deadwood beneath a Florida sky, I'll probably fail but I'll try
To recall the places and the names, conversations under ceiling frames
where I let my fear of the future subside and let it all go tonight.
And I'm just fine. Well, at least, I feel fine.
Whatever it is, ya know, I'm alive.
In this room where I just stare into you
Afraid of the moments that will soon pass
and it goes fast. God, just let this last.
The sun it rises like a flame, a reminder of these highways
I check the messages on my phone, they speak their lament but I am alone.
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